Positive parenting techniques form a strategy of parenting that focuses on rewarding positive behaviour and minimising the responses to undesirable behaviour. Positive parenting has many benefits for children and parents. Research suggests that adopting these techniques calmly and consistently strengthens the bond between parents and children, enhances the learning capacity of the child and supports the development of self-esteem and self-worth in children.
When parents choose to use other strategies such as punishments, shouting, or smacking a child, it leads to the child's emotional responses elevating. The emotional brain of all humans is not a brain that is in its optimal learning capacity, instead, the brain enters a state of fight, flight or flee. Sometimes our children can reach a state of emotion that enters this state without a parent's involvement. In these circumstances when a child is past the point of being able to self-regulate, it can be helpful to calm your child as much as possible before attempting to teach them lessons about their relationships, behaviours and environment.
Have a look at the 10 positive parenting techniques listed below:
1. Use your own behaviour to guide your child. Role modelling kind, calm, and predictable behaviour supports our children to learn through observation.
2. Show your child how you feel. Telling your child honestly how their behaviour affects you can build empathy and partnership.
3. Catch your child being ‘good’. When your child is behaving in a way you like, give your child some positive feedback.
4. When giving positive feedback, use descriptive praise, and be specific about how they are achieving.
5. Children love attention, and when no attention is available, even negative attention is better than none. Look for the clue or motivation behind challenging behaviours.
6. Allow your child to calm down, and then get down to their level to show that you are actively listening and connect with them to talk.
7. Listening actively makes children feel respected and comforted. It can even diffuse potential tantrums. Nodding and asking more questions can help a child bond and trust a parent when they are distressed.
8. Remember to match your expectations of your children with their age and stage-appropriate ability. Parenting to the child's ability over the adult's needs builds self-esteem.
9. Clear, achievable and consistent massaging is important. When you follow through on your promises/consequences, good or bad, your child learns to trust and respect you.
10. The environment around your child can influence their behaviour, make sure there is a safe and stimulating space for play.